wisdom teeth.

well, i am wisdomteethless. and yes, that is a word.

i once had four teeth that spoke to deep wisdom of my evolution. i now do not. instead, i have a flappy gum that my dentist says is 'normal' and a bunch of stitches that should dissolve any minute now. and, because of all this, i spent the greater part of 72hours in my bed. thank goodness my parents had the good sense to buy me a full size bed and repaint my room, otherwise i'd be in a twin bed in a blood red room (i blame being 15 and thinking i was being 'artsy').

i've had a few faithful friends come with ice packs, passion fruit green tea smoothies creme popped and seasons of the office come and pay homage to the once molars. but, mostly, i've been asleep.

however, while i haven't been sleeping or making headbands (check ::create:: !!), i've been thinking. thinking a lot.

i've been thinking about an ethic of pain verses an ethic of happiness. i was lead down this path because around day three of drinking only fruit and missing hard, chewy, crunchy food, i realized how much of my happiness came from food. a lot. and i realized that if, for some reason, i was without a jaw (just go with it), i could potentially be miserable. i would be miserable because i would have to drink my fruit the rest of my life. the thought of drinking fruit naturally made me think of my vegetarian and even vegan friends. they did not eat steak, they did not eat burgers. yet, for most of those friends, not eating certain food was a choice. a very deliberate choice. i'm not saying that i eat only steak, because that is very far from true. but, i do love it. i love beef. i do. what i'm saying is this: some people choose what, to me, would be miserable and, more than that, some people are not even given that choice (ie: people without jaws or people in extreme poverty). yet, i almost panic at the thought of only eating fruit the rest of my life.

what does that say about me?

that i am greedy? yes.

that i am a glutton? yes.

that my relationship with food is not as healthy as it should be? yes.

that i am an over thinker? well, yes.

i cannot help but realize how many decisions i make each day that are out of an ethic of pleasure. if it pleases me, and hurts no one in the immediate future, that i do it. if it does not please me, that i do not do it. now, i like to think that i am more evolved than that, and i might be, but not by much.

i'm not saying that we all need to be vegetarians and read Food Life and raise awareness about the food industry. i'm not. what i am saying is that it wouldn't be horrible if we thought about our decisions a little more. i know that not all vegans and vegetarians are righteous and are subscribing to an ethic of pain v pleasure. no. but for me, katie, there is something going on when i realize that i do not even consider the 'other' when i make my food decisions...because...it...makes...me...happy.

i read Food Life while laid up. i also read The Omnivore's Dilemma. lots to think about.

i want to be a woman who is a woman of integrity. as christians, we must stop living our lives as if no one else is affected by the seemingly mundane daily decisions we make. we are connected, and as christians, it is our biblical mandate to care for the 'other'.

who are the 'other's you impact without knowing it? and better, can you name those others?

all just thoughts.

until later,